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Foster Parents: The Front Line of Hope, Healing, and Advocacy

  • Writer: Margaret
    Margaret
  • Sep 18
  • 5 min read
Media by Wix
Media by Wix

When most people think of front-line workers, they picture paramedics, nurses, or firefighters—those who respond to emergencies with sirens and scrubs. But there’s another kind of front-line worker whose impact is quieter, deeper, and often overlooked: foster parents.


I’ve fostered over 20 children in state custody in New Mexico. Some stayed for just 48 hours, others for up to three years. Each child arrived carrying trauma, uncertainty, and a story that needed rewriting. And each time, I showed up—not because it was easy, but because this work is purpose-driven; anchored in love and advocacy.


Foster parents are the first responders to emotional emergencies. We step into brokenness and offer stability. We advocate, nurture, and rebuild. We change lives—the children’s and our own.


The Many Faces of Foster Parenting

Foster care is not one-size-fits-all. There are many ways to serve, each vital and uniquely demanding. Children in care have different needs, which is why there are several types of foster care. Some children stay just a few nights, while others need a home for a longer time.


Let's look at seven types of foster care placements:


1). Emergency Foster Care

Emergency foster care offers immediate or unplanned placement for children in crisis, such as those in unsafe home environments. These placements are typically short-term, lasting from a couple of days to a few weeks, until more permanent arrangements can be made. Emergency foster parents must be flexible and prepared to manage emotionally challenging situations.



2). Short-Term Foster Care

Short-term fostering involves foster parents caring for a child for a defined duration, known as a temporary placement. It is important to understand that the main goal is to reunite the child with their birth family, suggesting that the child is expected to eventually return home. This arrangement typically lasts for weeks or months, although it can occasionally extend longer depending on various factors.


3). Long-Term Foster Care

Long-term foster care provides a stable and loving environment for children who cannot return to their birth families or kin. These placements can last for several years, often until the child ages out of the system (reaching adulthood). The focus is on providing a secure home where the child can thrive.


4). Respite Care

Respite care is a type of placement designed to provide short-term relief by offering temporary care, such as over weekends, for a child. This allows their full-time foster caregivers or parents to take a break. The duration of this care can vary from a few hours to several days and is crucial for the well-being of both the child and the foster family. It is vital for foster families to have access to respite care to recharge and rejuvenate.


5). Therapeutic Fostering:

This placement is known as Treatment Foster Care (TFC) in my state of New Mexico and is designed for children with substantial mental, behavioral, or emotional health needs. Foster parents undergo specialized training and collaborate with a team of professionals, such as therapists and psychiatrists, to offer comprehensive support.


6). Kinship/Relative Foster Care:

This is a type of placement where children are placed with a family member, relative, or even a "fictive" family friend. Kinship care, as it is often referred to, plays a significant role in the child welfare system and has become an increasingly preferred option for ensuring that children remain connected to their familial roots while receiving the care and support they need.


7). Foster-to-Adopt: A type of placement where the goal is for the foster family to become the child's permanent adoptive family if reunification cannot be achieved. This arrangement is designed with a clear and significant objective: to transition a child from a temporary foster care situation into a stable, loving, and permanent family environment. The ultimate goal is for the foster family to evolve into the child's adoptive family, providing the child with a sense of belonging, security, and continuity that is crucial for their emotional and psychological development.


Each type requires discernment, flexibility, and a heart willing to stretch beyond comfort.


Unsplash [Photo by Hung Nguyen]
Unsplash [Photo by Hung Nguyen]

What It Takes to Be a Successful Foster Parent

During my journey as a foster mom, I realized early on that success in fostering isn't about achieving perfection; it's about being present. These are some qualities that support this calling:


  • Resilience: You’ll face heartbreak and healing. Stay grounded!

  • Empathy: Trauma isn't always shown through tears; learn to interpret silence.

  • Flexibility: Plans change. Children change. You must adapt.

  • Teamwork: You are part of a care team—social workers, therapists, guardian ad-litem, birth families, medical providers, school/daycare.

  • Cultural humility: Respect and value the child's background and identity.

  • Strong sense of self: Know your boundaries, your values, and your capacity.


Foster parenting is not just caregiving—it’s emotional triage, stewardship, and advocacy in action.

The Importance of Self-Care

Foster parents frequently experience burnout without making it known. However, self-care is essential for survival, not a luxury.


  • Identify signs of burnout: Irritability, exhaustion, and emotional detachment.

  • Establish boundaries: With agencies, your schedule, and personal expectations.

  • Develop a support system: Connect with other foster parents, counselors, and faith groups.

  • Incorporate joyful activities: Walking, gardening, worship, and laughter.

  • Seek assistance: You don't have to handle everything by yourself. Ask for help when needed. My family have been a tremendous support, and I will be forever grateful to them for joining me on this journey to care and love on these precious children.


“Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” — Matthew 11:28


❌ Myths That Need Breaking

Let’s dismantle the false impressions that keep good people from stepping into this calling:

  • You don’t have to be married.

  • You don’t have to be wealthy.

  • You don’t need to own a home. As long as you have a safe and stable home, whether you rent or own.

  • You will get attached—and that’s the point.

  • Foster children are not “damaged”—they are healing.


Foster parenting is not about fixing—it’s about showing up and holding space for restoration.


Duties of a Foster Parent

Foster parents serve as more than just caregivers; they are stabilizers, advocates, and bridge-builders. Here are a few things they do:

  1. Provide a safe, nurturing home.

  2. Support education, health, and emotional needs.

  3. Document progress and attend meetings.

  4. Advocate in court, school, and community.

  5. Encourage healthy contact with birth families (when appropriate).

  6. Model consistency, love, and accountability.


These responsibilities are demanding, but they are also deeply transformative.


How to Begin the Journey

If your heart is stirring, here’s how to start:

1. Attend an orientation with your local child welfare agency.

2. Complete an application and background check.

3. Take pre-serviced training

4. Complete a home study—interviews, safety checks, and readiness assessment.

5. Receive your license and prepare to welcome a child.


Depending on your state or country, it's advisable to contact your local child welfare agency for more precise information on how to become a foster parent. The details provided above are only general guidelines.


Foster parenting transforms lives—both the child's and your own. It's more than just caregiving; it's kingdom work, advocacy, healing, and hope. If you've ever questioned your ability to make a difference, rest assured: you already have the power to do so.


“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves… defend the rights of the poor and needy.” — Proverbs 31:8–9


Thank you for reading!


I remain Yours in The Faith


Margaret (MKO)

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